GWF Energy Merrick Stages … The Good News …
I suppose the best news of the weekend was seeing Matt Reid back in harness alongside Kieran O’Kane after that fright he gave us at Solway when the paraffin budgie had to airlift him to the Infirmary in Dumfries. Fortunately it was just a scare rather than a problem. His ‘wee turn’ was regarded as a surprise by those folks who reckoned that Kieran doesn’t go quick enough to frighten Matt, but maybe it was just that Matt saw Kieran first thing in the morning – without his makeup!
On Friday night before the Merrick Stages, Rally Manager Allan Marshall was taken ill. Medics were called and he was transferred to Dumfries & Galloway Royal Infirmary where he was detained overnight for observation. He was allowed to return to the rally on Saturday afternoon where he was delighted to see how well the event had been received and was awarded the ‘Spirit of the Rally’ trophy at the prizegiving that evening.
And another one. Sandy Arbuthnot was medi-vacced off his cable-laying ship the week before the rally and spent three days in Hospital. “I felt fine when I came out on the Monday,” said Sandy, “and thought why not? So I put a late entry in for the Merrick. He should have stayed in bed! The Metro boiled over on SS1, then understeered off the road in SS2, bending a front steering arm. He was last seen sorting the steering arm – with a sledgehammer.
The Rest of the News – and Gossip
On his first run out since this event last year, former Scottish Rally Champion Jon Burn was surprised at the pace of this year’s front runners. He finished in sixth place in his Impreza WRC: “I stalled on the start line of the first stage,” said Burn, “and then had a couple of spins in the fast third test. It’s all about getting confidence back, but the biggest surprise is the pace of the guys at the front. Trying to catch them is like shooting for the moon!” He was lucky to make the rally though, at 6.00 pm on Thursday night the gearbox was on the garage floor – in bits! Some things never change, eh.
Speaking of gearboxes, Alick Kerr was supposed to be running Course Car but at the pre-event test day, it developed a fault: His long suffering Dad said: “It’s the gearbox – again. It’s been in and out that many times it knows the way itself!”
If Bob Morland is lying on his back somewhere in Italy waggling his tootsies in the sunshine, then maybe this will give him a shock when he surfs the Internet to find Scotland’s favourite rally magazine. The poor sod handed over his keys to the Faulkner and Foy team for the Merrick weekend while Bob was off on a romantic tour of Tuscany for a month. Well, there were parties every night, every dish dirtied and stacked in the sink, cairry oot curry containers and bits of pizza stuck to the carpets, the lock on the drinks cabinet cut through with a welding torch, the neighbours terrorised, , the lavvy blocked, the phone left on the hook to the speaking clock in Australia, and the fridge door left open and top off the milk, so by the time he gets back the milk will be walking out the door to meet him! …. Only kidding Bob, the boys left it as they found it – or is that even worse?
Now here’s a question. If you try to bribe the Scroots, do you do it before you present your car or after it has passed? Now a certain driver, who shall remain nameless, but we’ll call him Jordan, is sponsored by the Apple Pie Bakery in Carnwath, an absolute haven for a serious portion of your ‘five a day’ wrapped up in scrumptious pastry. Anyway, Jordan had a spare apple pie and with not a teacher in sight (an apple for the teacher, remember?) he thought that the Scroots deserved some tasty nourishment for standing out in the cold and the wet in Wigtown Square. Now, I’m dead certain sure that the thought of bribery never entered Jordan’s head, but he gave the Scroots the pie to share out, which they did, and thoroughly enjoyed by all accounts – then they failed his car! Now what do think, was that fair? But as Chief Scroot pointed out to me later, they didn’t actually ‘fail’ it, they just asked him to go away and fix something and bring it back. Which he did, and everyone was happy. Smiles all round. But guess who’s going to make a bid for the spare apple pie next time? I’ll road test anything.
I used to be a staunch supporter of Digby and crew’s rallying innovations to encourage youngsters to take up the sport, but now I’m not so sure. Just what are they teaching these youngsters these days? Sportsmanship, or winning at all costs? But seriously I had to laugh. I was listening to Calum Atkinson at first service complaining about catching a certain wee Honda in the first two stages and he was expressing concern about the faster stages to come in Glentrool. Now, the thing is, Calum looks about as threatening as a feather duster and about as fierce as a Labrador with a rubber bone, but he was standing there giving it serious verbal: “If I catch him and he gets in my way, I’ll have him off!” Well, I just had to laugh. The thought of this nice, canny lad threatening physical violence? There’s more chance of catching him knitting mittens than in a punch-up. I was laughing so hard the tears were filling up my wellies.
Speaking of Calum, he clinched the Brick & Steel Ecosse Challenge at the weekend, but that was for drivers, the co-driver’s title went to Keith Riddick, but only after a personal sacrifice from his driver, Scott Peacock’s faither. Although Scott was not in the running for overall Challenge points, Keith still needed points for his own title bid. Although Scott had managed to re-shell the 205 that they wrecked on the Solway Coast, they hit a couple of snags on the Saturday morning. “There were 10 or 11 of us finishing the car off on Thursday night,” said Scott, “Keith finished about 2 am and I finished about 3, but the car was ready for the test day.” The team duly turned up at Glencaird and did a few runs but on the Friday night it developed a few faults. At that point, Donald Peacock withdrew his own entry and let the boys use his own 205. Donald even gave his two new tyres bought for this even to Calum Atkinson which no doubt helped him to clinch 2nd Peugeot on the day and the Brick & Steel Ecosse Challenge title. Nice one Donald.
Speaking of eedjits, they were at it again on the Merrick, playing ‘Horse’ when they should have been rallying (see previous Gossips!). This time Keith beat Scott 3 – 1, again.
Although he rallies an Evo5, Alistair Inglis has a severe hankering for a Citroen DS3, no doubt due in no small part to the fact that he is the Boss of the Duthies for Citroen garage in Montrose. So it was no wonder that he was seen pestering Jonny Greer at times during the day. “I actually bid for that car,” said Alistair pointing at Jonny’s DS3, “that was the one that Freddie Flintoff rolled on the TV programme ‘A League of their Own’ but Jonny beat me to it.” Even though he now has three at home, Jonny wasn’t up for doing any deals, despite the vast sums being offered (he was talking lira though, not sterling or Euros!) by Alistair.
Caroline Carslaw got out of her sick bed to score second in class on the Merrick. She wasn’t well on the Friday so faither brought the car down to Wigtown on Friday and Mrs C drove Caroline down on Saturday morning – a sort of arrive and drive deal in other words. Anyway, Caroline did well despite a couple of mad dives into ditches on the first stage, but didn’t the team look good! Caroline has done a deal with Glasgow based Trespass clothing who supplied them with new jackets and tee shirts, although where her faither picked up that auld baggy set of ovies, gawd knows. He must have nicked them off a 25 stone Clydebank boilermaker and Donald’s that skinny he’d blow away in a draught.
And finally …
The Laird o’ Dubai popped over to Galloway for a royal visit and helped Jim McDowall at the prizegiving after the rally. But for someone who works in the sunshine capital of world, he looks awfy peelly waally, but this was easily explained. Big Roy lives in a fancy air-conditioned apartment, drives a luxury air-conditioned car and works in modern air-conditioned office and explained: “If anyone comes into my office and says you’ve got to come outside to see this – I just tell them – ‘bring me a fotie’!”